He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
