We're facebook friends in real life
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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