Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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