i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
