Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
