i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
