Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
