That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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