lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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