Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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