i permit you to call me
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
