is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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