ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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