Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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