READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
