I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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