My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
