So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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