i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
