i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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