doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize