i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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