dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
