Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
