If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
