dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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