Whoa Z and x make the same sound
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
