I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
