Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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