I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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