Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
