Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize