Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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