He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
please come you make the beer taste better
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Life is so much better after having sex.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Boobs speak an international language.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Randomize
