I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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