I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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