the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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