Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
