The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
