I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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