whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
