Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
After tacos, we're chasing women.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
