Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
its not stalking. its research.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
