But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
