How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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