Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I love you. Go after that dick
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
