what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
