I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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