I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
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