life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Woke up backwards on a recliner
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
